You are Sarah's Daughter

Today is my 38th birthday. For the last few years my birthday has been a reminder of John's illness. On my 35th birthday we met Dr. Raizer. We were told after John's surgery on August 31, 2004 that a doctor from the Tumor Board would come to meet with us. On September 1st Jeffrey Raizer walked into John's room in the ICU and said, "I'm Jeff Raizer, the neuro-oncologist." I said, "Did you just say oncologist? We were told this was not a cancerous tumor." And so the journey with treatments and recovery began.

This week we decided to begin an experimental treatment protocol. Dr. Hantel, the Russian Orthodox oncologist whom I love, recommended we try this vascular inhibitor instead of traditional chemo. This is the same treatment Dr. Raizer recommended, in fact it is Raizer's study. The process of getting baseline data for the study should begin next week including MRIs, lab work, etc etc. We hope to have the medication within two weeks. No one can predict the results with certainty, but our hope is that the decay of John's bones will cease so that healing can occur. Continue to pray about the calcium leaking into his blood, as this is dangerous.

If you have read John's blog, you will know the word God gave him about living a long life. John desires to grow in faith because as we read in Romans 4: 3 "Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness." I have reflected on the life of Sarah as I enter a journey with my "Abraham". God did not speak the promise to Sarah, he spoke it to Abraham. But that word effected Sarah's life and required of her great faith. How am I to grow in faith as I walk alongside John on this journey away from Ur and smack dab into a desert?

When I asked this at a prayer gathering, my friend Barb said, "You know what it says in I Peter 3:4? You are Sarah's daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear." Alleluia. This is my verse!!

Lord, help me to do what is right. Help me to give my life away in love and service, keeping nothing in my bag for later. And Lord, I confess my fears and my propensity toward listening to the words of the world, the flesh and the devil. I will listen to your word and it is DO NOT GIVE WAY TO FEAR. Keep me in the life of the Spirit which is the life of the moment... and there I find you.

Psalm 27

The LORD is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The LORD is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?
When evil men advance against me
to devour my flesh,
when my enemies and my foes attack me,
they will stumble and fall.
Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then will I be confident.
One thing I ask of the LORD,
this is what I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD
all the days of my life,
to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD
and to seek him in his temple.